The following is helpful information and suggestions garnered from years of youth baseball parenting experience. We at F.A.B.L. hope it helps.
1. Understand that young boys playing baseball are very self-conscious. The nature of the game is such that the focus is always on where the ball is. If your son is hitting the ball, fielding the ball, pitching the ball or running to a base where the ball is being thrown, he is aware that all eyes are on him. Be proud of him for playing baseball. Admire him for overcoming his "stage fright." Love him for having the courage to step up to the plate. Smile at him when he strikes out and doesn't throw his bat or helmet and is eager for his next time at the plate. If he is upset about a bad day at the plate, remind him that Babe Ruth holds the career strike-out record, that he will do better next game and that you love him and are proud of him. Never berate, ridicule or criticize his baseball playing. If HE ASKS you about a certain aspect of his play, then yes, be critical if you are giving him positive information and baseball advice. Kids always want to please their parents, if he didn't do well, he feels bad enough. Don't make it worse for him by piling your disappointment on top of his own. A big hug and a smile is the best remedy for a youth baseball batting slump. Yogi Berra once said, "A batting slump is like a cold, no matter what you do, it takes ten days to go away!" Never forget that hitting a round ball with a round bat is the most difficult thing to do in any sport and throwing baseballs for strikes is right up there with hitting.
2. F.A.B.L. managers and coaches are volunteering their time to oversee a youth baseball team. They are putting in this time and effort for the love of baseball and to do something positive for the youth in our community. Most of the time, the manager and coach have a son playing on the team. F.A.B.L. has no requirement concerning the level of baseball knowledge or experience a coach or manager has. We simply appreciate them for taking on the obligation of running a team. Therefore, a parent has no right to expect an F.A.B.L. team manager or coach to TEACH or INSTRUCT their child on how to play baseball. If a coach or manager is willing to teach and has the experience and knowledge, consider yourself and son lucky. I should add that school coaches and managers are paid, but they are paid to oversee a team, NOT to teach your son to play baseball. The school head coach will try out players and pick the best players who give him the best chance to win. The best advice we can give is for you to seek out professional baseball instructors. This area is very rich in top-notch professional baseball instructors who can teach all aspects of the game. There are several local baseball summer camps which do a great job teaching youth baseball. F.A.B.L. will soon make available a listing of approved instructors which can be downloaded from this web site.
3. Young boys moving from about 11 years-old into the 12 or 13 year-old range tend to be sensitive about interaction with their parents in front of their team mates. They seem to feel a need to exhibit some independence. Don't go over to the dugout offering drinks, towels, cookies or asking questions, unless your son motions you over. Have an understanding with your son that if he wants a drink, towel or whatever, he should get permission from a coach to leave the dugout and go over to where you are sitting. Of course, you should furnish him with a drink to take with him into the dugout. Young baseball players want to be cool! He is cool if he has cool parents. Be cool and chill out! :) Fight those parental instincts to hover over your child.
4. How does a parent handle a situation where there is conflict with the team manager or a coach regarding the way the team is run or how the manager or coach deals with your son? The one thing you should not do is discuss with the manager or coach your displeasure at the baseball field, practice or around any players or other parents. Be careful what you say to other parents; don't get caught up in a let's gang up on the coach mentality. Don't embarrass any coaches, team managers or yourself in public. The way to correctly deal with situations is on the phone with the manager, discreetly and in private. If the problem involved a coach, you should first call the team manager and discuss the problem with him. He should be the one to speak with and deal with his coach. Be classy in the way you handle situations and yourself. Remember, your SON is listening, watching and learning about problem solving.
5. If a particular problem between player/parent and manager/coach can't be solved directly with the team manager, understand F.A.B.L. has a limited amount of power or rights when it comes to telling an independent team manager how to run his team or how to deal with an internal problem. If the manager is in violation of a particular F.A.B.L. rule, then the league has great authority to take action, but short of F.A.B.L. rule violations, we as a league can only intervene in the form of mediator to resolve problems. Please understand that there are certain matters that we feel fall so much in the domain of the team manager's authority that we will refuse to intervene on your behalf. Examples of this would be: 1) the amount of playing time your son is getting; 2) benching a player for conduct, behavioral or disciple problems or failing to make a practice session; 3) the way a third base coach or manager calls the game; 4) requesting or having your son play a position he doesn't consider his primary position. Our league is strong because we try to operate within a defined structure of baseball tradition.
6. What are the tournament bids all about? The bids are the backbone of F.A.B.L. and are extremely important to you and your son. The NABF, AABC, PONY, AAABC and Babe Ruth are the most important youth baseball programs in the United States . They are duly noted on the third floor of the National Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown , New York . F.A.B.L. through its affiliation with these organizations has been permitted the right to select the very best teams in various age groups, under different criteria and award them a bid to play in the regional championship tournament. Winners of the regional tournaments will go on to a national championship. It is very important for your son and his team to go on these tournaments if his team wins a bid.
7. Parents should understand that going away on baseball tournaments is a very important learning process for the serious baseball player. The experience is invaluable. To obtain a scholarship your son will be required, in more than one instance, to travel away to another state, stay with his teammates in a hotel and play baseball against players from different parts of the country. We encourage our young players to go away on tournaments to help them become comfortable with the practice of traveling to unfamiliar surroundings and playing on different types of fields. They learn not to be intimidated by players from different parts of the country. These types of travel experiences emulate what college ball players experience on their away games. It is truly an invaluable and important experience! You should support the concept of tournament youth baseball.
8. Parents should NOT go out on the playing field during team practices or during games. Your son, his team mates, team manager and coaches are the only individuals who are covered by medical and liability insurance. If a team manager should ask a parent or non-roster coach to help on the field, he is violating F.A.B.L. rules and regulation.
9. If your son appears to have been hurt while playing, refrain from going on the field IMMEDIATELY. WAIT, give him a chance to get up and dust himself off. Let the team coaches and manager attend to him for that first 40 second. Give him a chance to get up on his own. If he is able to walk to the dugout, then by all means, go over to the dugout and learn the extent of his injury.
10. Read the F.A.B.L. recruiting rules carefully. Understand that once a player is on the roster of an F.A.B.L. team, he must finish the season with that team. He is not allowed to leave a team and switch to another F.A.B.L. team during the season. If you are being contacted about your son playing for another F.A.B.L. team or your son is being recruited by anyone representing another F.A.B.L. team, you MUST report this to F.A.B.L. immediately. Being involved with illegal recruiting can cause your son and the person doing the recruiting to be suspended or banned for life from F.A.B.L. baseball. There is a proper and correct way to leave a team and it is not done during the season. F.A.B.L. doesn't teach children to quit.
11. Alcoholic beverages are banned from the site of all F.A.B.L. baseball games.
12. Parents are expected to always carry themselves with dignity. At a game you can cheer for your child and his team. It is not acceptable for you to make disparaging remarks about opposing players, managers or coaches. Every player on the other team has parents who love them as much as you love your child. Vulgar and profane language will not be tolerated under any circumstances. Never forget that the players on the baseball field are children! There will be many times in your career as a baseball parent when you think an umpire has made a bad call. Actually, the umpire's call might be correct, but from your angle of view it might seem incorrect. You, as a parent have absolutely NO part to play in this aspect of the game. You should never make a comment, especially one heard by others, about umpire calls. Team managers and coaches can question an umpire's call. That is part of the game. Understand that F.A.B.L. has a standard of on-field behavior it expects its managers and coaches to comply with while they are on the field and around children. Managers and coaches have been banned for life from F.A.B.L. not because they lacked self control on a baseball field but because they lacked self control around children.
13. Parents must keep the youth baseball games in perspective. Young boys playing amateur baseball is not to be compared to or rationalized into professional baseball. The F.A.B.L. baseball season is considered a success when highly competitive youth baseball has been played with no serious injuries. Players, parents, coaches and managers have had a positive experience regardless of how many games were won or lost, the players developed into better players, great plays and games became a part of our memory and the player ends the season with a love for the game and can't wait for next year!
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